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Ignoring Employee Conflicts Can be Dangerous

Managers often ignore conflicts between employees hoping they will disappear or resolve themselves. Clashes between co-workers often begin as work-related issues then spiral into personal and emotional conflicts. Long-term disagreements can actually damage your company's culture, employee morale and overall productivity.

Unfortunately, in this tight labor market, employees who might have left for another job if a conflict arose are unable to do so. This often results in escalating emotional situations in the workplace and more employee issues for managers.

In this litigious age of employment, many managers are reluctant to "meddle" in personal conflicts. Employees often tell managers that it's none of their business as long as "they're still doing their job." However, if it's happening at work on company time, even if it's subtle or passive, it is the manager's business.

Employee conflicts rarely involve just two parties and often entangle and polarize others. When employees begin passing information back and forth and taking sides, it ceases to become merely a conflict and turns into a company "sporting" event. Coworkers begin to take an active part, but only one person can be the winner.

Because it's hard to quantify or define these types of conflicts, managers are hesitant to act. Here are some signals that a bonafide conflict exists and requires action:

  • A work-related conflict between two employees was never resolved.
  • It is a "well-known fact" that two parties do not like each other.
  • The two employees go out of their way to avoid or antagonize one another.
  • Many employees seem to have an opinion about the conflict and are sharing their thoughts with others in the office.
  • Other employees have asked their manager to resolve it.
  • A change in behavior is visible in one or both employees.

Failure to act gives other employees the impression that management is avoiding the conflict. Other consequences can be emotional issues for the employees directly involved, triggering stress-related absences or serious health issues.

A lack of confidence in their ability to resolve conflict is the main reason managers do not get involved. If the conflict is not an illegal harassment or discrimination issue, consider the following two-step approach.

Deal with both employees separately:

  • Acknowledge awareness that the conflict exists.
  • Ask each employee how he or she would like to be viewed within the organization.
  • Tell them candidly how they are viewed currently.
  • Describe how the conflict affects the business (productivity, lost time, etc.)
  • Ask if they are truly interested in returning to a non-conflict situation, and if they are willing to take actions to do so.
  • Describe consequences of not resolving the conflict.

Working with the employees together:

  • Have the employees list situations in which they must work together.
  • Get agreements on the behaviors they will exhibit (cordial tone of voice, a commitment to fully communicate, no overt body language such as eye rolling, making faces).
  • Ask if they will agree to discontinue all discussion of the conflict with others at work.
  • Make decisions about how progress will be measured: biweekly short meetings, etc.
  • Create an issue resolution process for them to use. Going behind each other's backs for help will not be tolerated.
  • Give appropriate praise for their participation in the conflict resolution process. This attention will help replace the attention they get as either the "victim" or the "perpetrator."

There are resources available if managers feel uncomfortable conducting employee sessions of this nature. Employee Assistance Programs or human resources consultants can help guide employers through the process. Attorneys usually reserve their Alternative Dispute Resolution skills for issues when the process is an alternative to legal action and rarely are involved in non-litigious employee conflicts.

Remember, employees at all levels in the organization can fall victim to conflicts with coworkers Left unresolved, these conflicts can damage careers and interfere with team-based work groups. Whether the conflict is based on perceived personality conflicts, differences in work styles or perceptions about work performance, acknowledging and addressing the conflict is part of a manager's responsibility and duty.

- Danielle Rodenbough, principal of Trouble At Work (TAW), a Human Resources Consulting firm, in Leawood, Kansas that specializes in small businesses. She may be contacted at 913-345-8592 or danielle@troubleatwork.net. From Creating Quality Newsletter, July 2003. Used with permission.

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Updated: 2/14/12